Ow #*#$%(*& !!!!!

So after our nice, fairly quiet but windy weekend ... I put the Rottens to bed. Kiss them goodnight. Head into the living room to read some of my book. Sit on the couch. Pick up book. *cue Rotten2 hollering for Momma* Get up. Go back in her room. Step on the floor and land inside the Barbie castle on the other side of the room.

What.the.fuck. It seems there was a pink, plastic high heeled dress up shoe left in the floor. And I stepped on it. And have now done something to my knee. After an hour last night of ice, four Ibuprofen, and a child that refused to sleep....I'm in serious pain. The good news? It's not black and blue and I can "walk." The not so good news? It's really swollen, hurts like a SOB, and my foot and toe movements are pretty limited.

*sigh*

Hmph.

I'm bored. Where is everyone? It's Friday. Play day. Pay day, even.

Hurricane Rita

For now, I shall try to confine all Hurricane Rita thoughts to this post, so check back often for updates.

I just spoke to DH. He's about halfway back from Houston. Should hit Dallas around midnight. First,an update - he ran into one of the nurses who he'd handed off the chart to. The chart. Of the man left behind in New Orleans. The only survivor in that particular hospital. She recognized him. And told him to expect a phone call from the man's lawyers. *cue my jaw hitting the floor and my heart pounding* Remember, technically DH and the others with him kidnapped this man across state lines. Yes, major medical hospitals legal teams advised them, but still...this has been a huge fear up to this point. Well, turns out the man is doing great and has been reunited with family in Chicago. And they are suing the shit out of the hospital, the doctors and nurses for abandoning him. DH is the hero of the day, in this man's eyes. *cue semi-normal, if slightly scared breathing* All will be fine. DH may be called to testify in this man's case against the hospitals. But NO ONE will be pressing charges where DH and his co-medics are concerned. Whew. *Giant sigh of relief here*

Now, on to the Hurricane at hand - Miss Rita. As of 9:30 CST, the National Weather Service has changed Rita's expected path slightly. She is now expected to land just west of Galveston. Which means that Galveston, Houston and areas east will be the hardest hit. Which is where my brother and his mom and step dad live. I've put in a call to him. If he plans to evacuate (which I'm really really hoping he does), I'm going to tell him to get his ass up here. Altho, at 22, he's invincible. *rolls eyes* He slept through the one and only hurricane he's ever lived through. Okay, so he was a whopping 5 months old at the time :)

And, with the slight change of Rita, her upgraded winds are now sitting at 175mph sustained with gusts up to 200 mph. Category 5. Worse than Katrina ever thought about being. And my house sits directly in her path only 300 or so miles inland. Rita is approx 300 miles wide. It's entirely possible that she could be a Cat 2 or slightly possible Cat 3 storm when she reaches the Dallas area. *cue Momma's freak out* DH and I are discussing evacuation plans via cell phone tonight. Depending on the next 24-48 hours, I may very well leave my house, as well. I don't want to do it. I will cry. I will bawl. But, I will survive. We live on the edge of Tornado Alley. And in all honesty, I don't know that my home can survive 70-80 mph winds. Right now, everything is speculation. But, I'm beginning to prepare myself for the worst. I'll be packing a few important papers and miscellaneous items tomorrow night, more than likely. The kids are supposed to spend this weekend with their dad. If I do leave, I'll be picking them up first. DH will be staying here. As he put it, someone has to be around to pick up the pieces. And he wasn't talking about our house. Sometimes, I hate the firefighter and medic that flows through his veins. The kids and I, if we leave, will head up to the farm. There's a tornado shelter and the ability to generate power and food for up to two weeks if needed.

I hate this. I don't want to have to deal with this at all. Hopefully, it won't be as awful as they are saying it could get. But, at this point, we are dealing with the 3rd largest hurricane in recorded history. Anything could happen.

EDITED TO ADD: As of Friday @ 11 am, here is Rita's projected landfall

For Monsty Doll

People come into your life for a reason, a season, or a lifetime.
When you figure out which it is, you know exactly what to do.

When someone is in your life for a REASON,
it is usually to meet a need you have expressed outwardly or inwardly.
They have come to assist you through a difficulty,
to provide you with guidance and support,
to aid you physically, emotionally, or spiritually.
They may seem like a godsend, and they are.
They are there for the reason you need them to be.

Then, without any wrong doing on your part or at an inconvenient time,
this person will say or do something to bring the relationship to an end.
Sometimes they die. Sometimes they walk away.
Sometimes they act up or out and force you to take a stand.
What we must realize is that our need has been met, our desire fulfilled; their work is done.
The prayer you sent up has been answered and it is now time to move on.

When people come into your life for a SEASON,
It is because your turn has come to share, grow, or learn.
They may bring you an experience of peace or make you laugh.
They may teach you something you have never done.
They usually give you an unbelievable amount of joy.
Believe it! It is real! But, only for a season.

LIFETIME relationships teach you lifetime lessons;
those things you must build upon in order to have a solid emotional foundation.
Your job is to accept the lesson, love the person/people (anyway);
and put what you have learned to use in all other relationships and areas of your life.
It is said that love is blind but friendship is clairvoyant.
~Author Unknown

Here we go again....

Joy Joy Joy
Here we go again!

Hurricane Rita is heading for the Texas Gulf Coast - Galveston and Houston are expected to take a direct hit on Friday. Larry is headed to Houston as I type to help evacuate patients from hospitals prior to the Hurricane hitting.

*sigh*

Rotten Pictures

I've been meaning to post these for a month now...here are the Rottens on their first day of school.

And here I am with Rotten2 on her first day of kindergarten. Sorry about the half up the nose shot, I didn't have anyone else to take the picture...

And this was taken the other morning off our front deck.

Miscellaneous Monday Mishaps

Ten days ago Rotten2 had a nasty stomach bug - lasted about 48 hours. Friday, Rotten1 announces that his throat hurts. Well, it's a tad red, but no fever or anything. I attribute it to allergies and he keeps going like nothing is wrong. Saturday is much the same. Same with Sunday. Until 1:30 this morning. Rotten 1 wakes me up crying. Seven year old boys do not cry. His throat hurting woke him up. And he won't talk above a quiet whisper. He's burning up. So, back to his room we go. Five minutes later - he has 102.3 temp, a bright red throat, extremely swollen tonsils and refuses to drink. At 9:45 am our pedi broke the news - he has strep. I now feel like the worst Momma in the world for allowing him to go to the farm and run around like a little redneck child for the weekend with the cows and horses and ride four wheelers when I should have had him at home and at the pedi on Saturday AM. Also, I'm now wondering if this is really what Rotten2 had last week. My neice also has strep (confirmed today) and she also has a stomach bug with it. Hmm.. World's Worst Momma goes to......ME!

Which Superhero are you? From here.
Name: Barbarella
Secret Identity: Momma's RL name
Special Power: Flight
Transportation: Shamu the Elephant
Weapon: Psionic Grenade
Costume: Spandex Pajamas
Sidekick: Festus
Nemesis: Tim the Elder
Tragic Flaw: Addicted to sugar
Favorite Food: Clam Chowder (Monsty, this part is not true.)

And there was something else...what was it? Hmm...Oh yeah...My Avon lady had an extra in her latest order, so...Carey, this is for you.

For Zombs.....

Smell any better now?

*grin*

Be patient

Sitting in the living room, doing puzzles nicely with her brother, my 5 year old Rotten begins singing "Be patient, be patient, don't have to hurry hurry..be patient, be patient, don't have to hurry hurry."

And I start dying laughing. If you knew my drama queen, my 5 year old who's going on 15 - or any 5 year old little girl, you'd know just how funny this really is. Patience is not something my children come by naturally.

Bored

Okay, so I don't want to do any work. And our phones are quiet - thank goodness. So I've been playing with blogger templates. And I've figured out a few things. I can change colors all over the page. Except I can't find colors that look pretty together yet. *sigh* What do you think of the blue? What would suit me better? Any ideas?

By the way, I need a picture......HELP!

Okay, Okay...threadjack the hell out of it. Sheesh.

Goldfish!

Why does it give me a freaking complex when I eat Goldfish crackers? I feel like I should be committing murder or something by eating these little fishie shaped crackers. Maybe if they didn't have that stupid grin plastered across their faces it wouldn't be so bad. Or maybe if the commercials didn't show them singing and dancing...

Blech!

I hate hate HATE being sick. Especially with stomach viruses.

And I really want to spray my kids down with Lysol and bathe them in a vat of antibacterial soap for bringing this fun bug home with them.

Blogthings.......

What Your Underwear Says About You

You have a lucky pair of underwear. And you wear it more than you should. You're a closet exhibitionist who gets a thrill from being secretly naughty.

The Underwear Oracle

Your Brain's Pattern

Your brain is always looking for the connections in life. You always amaze your friends by figuring out things first. You're also good at connecting people - and often play match maker. You see the world in fluid, flexible terms. Nothing is black or white.

What Pattern Is Your Brain?

You Are 60% Weird

You're so weird, you think you're *totally* normal. Right? But you wig out even the biggest of circus freaks!

How Weird Are You?

Warning: Emotional Post

Warning: Emotional Post Ahead. Please check all baggage at the gate and leave your floaties behind. It's about to get deep.

The more time passes since last Monday, the more I am able to sort through the emotions surrounding me. While I was not a victim of Katrina by any real stretch of the imagination (other than a 40 cent per gallon gas increase), it's outreaching waves did touch my house, my life, and my community.

My children are no longer naive. They now realize, at 5 and 7, that people really do lose everything and there's nothing that can be done to stop it. That even though I have had them donate to womens shelters several times a year, have had my father live with us for two years to keep him from living on the streets, and have spoken with them about children and families that have no home or toys or food - it's not been enough. It never became real to them until they saw the evacuees of New Orleans and surrounding areas here. In our own community. I've shielded them from the most graphic scenes, but they have watched the city flood. They have seen the coastline of Mississippi leveled. They have seen the debris left behind by a fallen home. And they now know that it happens. To people. Just.like.us. And they want to know why. I've abated some of the questions as purely weather related - a hurricane is Mother Nature's doing. People can't do anything about it. I've calmed the fears by having them help collect and sort donations. They have gone through their toys and found ones that they don't play with, ones that another child "needs." They have donated from their piggybanks to the Salvation Army. And it's been their choice. My son was in tears because he couldn't go to the campgrounds to play with these children who have nothing left in their lives but their parents. My daughter has wrapped her little brain around some of the facts and come away with the knowledge that sometimes Mommy and Daddy can't protect them from everything. At 5 and 7, these aren't things I would choose to teach them. I'd love to have preserved their innocence a bit longer. But, it wasn't to be. And, in a way, I'm glad. They are growing up in a home that holds community and love up as an offering, something to be a part of, to take care of. And now, they understand why a bit more. It's a lesson I never could have taught them on my own. In a way, I'm angry. And I'm sad. And a bit uncomfortable with it all.

I have even lost a bit of innocence that I clung to. Somehow, even after 9/11, I held on to the belief that if something tragic were to happen to our country, we'd survive, the government and our fellow countrymen would take care of us. And to a point, that has happened. Much more in the last 5 days than in the first 3 following Katrina's wrath. I still do not understand why it had to take so long. And why so many had to die. And I hate it. I hate that people died for little reason. I hate the fact that people were left to die in hospitals. I hate the fact that people could not or chose not to leave for whatever reason. I hate the idea that some felt like they had no other choice. I'm angry that it had to pan out this way.

As you all know, my husband went down to New Orleans twice. He and others from his company evacuated many from hospitals, nursing homes, and step down hospitals. These people had no way of evacuating. Two things really upset and anger me about this. First of all, why were these not some of the first places evacuated when the Hurricane was shown to be heading for the Gulf Coast and New Orleans three days earlier? Second, why were some of these people left for dead? How in the hell can nurses and doctors walk away from patients that they have taken an oath to assist? I just do not understand it. I cannot comprehend it. And to put first responders from Texas, Louisiana, Mississippi, and many other states at risk to rescue these people just boggles my mind. It wouldn't have been such a big deal if the hadn't had to worry about the looters and shooters. But to have military and Department of Defense contractors as their armed guards....it just isn't right. There are no other words for it. And now, I sit here waiting on the phone call that says even though the evacuations are pretty well completed for the hospitals and all across the three states...my husband may be heading out to Louisiana or Mississippi at a moments notice to relieve others there and provide non-critical care to those still in the areas.

In the beginning, I was extremely angry with President Bush for his lack of response. Hanging out on vacation for a couple more days and then making a big show of flying over the horrid areas after he'd cut his vacation short by two days. And I'm still angry. He's the final stop in the chain of command. If others in lower positions couldn't handle it, he should have been available to step in and make the decisions to get things done. And that is the primary source of my anger towards him. It was lessened a bit by the realization a day or two ago that the federal government sent the Governor of Louisiana a legal proposal for assisting in evacuation of New Orleans and surrounding areas that was turned down. I still cannot get past the shock, anger, and pure ire that rises in me to know that there was an offer of help prior to the loss of life, the destruction, the anarchy that happened in that area. The stupidity of some continues to amaze me. To turn down the offer because it was too close to martial law? What.the.fuck. Martial law was declared Monday afternoon/evening. Lots of good it did to keep that from happening, hunh, Gov. Blanco?

And then there's the whole FEMA/Department of Homeland Security issue...The Dept of Homeland Security was formed after 9/11 to protect this country, to plan for disaster. FEMA was restructured, gutted, and re-born with one of their primary objectives being a plan to evacuate a major city in the time of disaster. Where the hell was FEMA during the first couple of days??? I realize it takes time to organize troops and get them on the road and into the city. BUT. They had warning. It's not like Katrina just popped up off the Gulf Coast and slammed into Louisiana, Mississippi and Alabama all within 12 hours. And for the idiots to stand around with their thumbs up their asses and not be able to figure out that CNN was reporting live and telling them where people were...ugh. If I could figure it out, you'd think they could too. It's not like MSNBC was making up the footage of thousands of evacuees hiding at the NO Convention Center.

And then...there's the news coverage. I realize the NO was 80% under water due to the levee break. But...why is New Orleans getting 95% of the news coverage? Many towns outside of New Orleans - in Louisiana and Mississippi were leveled. Looters went beyond downtown NO. Hell, they were in small towns across the Gulf Coast. They even stole vans from NEW YORK and DROVE DOWN TO LOUISIANA!!!! Homes, towns were gone....and where were the reporters? Hovering in New Orleans. Why were they not giving equal coverage to the other affected areas? Are those areas less important? Is there damage any less? Are their lives worth little? Are the rescues not needed?

The bright spot in much of this for me has been Mayor Nagin. He may not have done everything he could, but as Mayor, I'm not real sure what his capabilities were. What surprised me was that he actually stayed in New Orleans for the storm. He didn't leave his people. And in the aftermath, he continued to stand with his city in a falling down Hyatt with no water, no electricity and minimal food. His conditions were better than those in the Superdome or on their rooftops, but you know what? He was there. He was trying to get help. He made public pleas for assistance. And probably most upstanding of all? He called out the Governor and the President and FEMA for their lack of assistance, the lack of communication, the chaos of it all. He wasn't afraid to display his anger, his sadness, his remorse. He wasn't afraid to speak up as the voice of those in downtown, in the Superdome, in the Convention Center and those who had evacuated prior to Katrina. Finally, even if only for a few brief days, we have a politician, an elected official willing to tell the truth and to speak out. I swear, if this man runs for Governor, Senator, or even higher - he's got a better publicity rating going that Rudy did in New York. And now, to realize that he has had to once again issue a mandatory evacuation order, possibly involving force to get people to leave their homes due to major health hazards...shows that he is willing and able to take care of his own people in their time of need. He has not left them. And that says a lot. Even if he screws up, he's there. And the man is trying. Which, unfortunately, is more than I can say for many.

There it is. Anger, sadness, despair, frustration...and lack of emotion. All rolled into one. What am I going to do about it all? Right now, I'm channelling it all into our county. Over 200 people are here. And they need help. So I'm helping. Beyond that...I'm not sure. That's one I'm still sorting through in my mind. But, for now, suffice it to say, Katrina has changed the way my husband and I will live our lives.

I have a new pet!

I have a new pet! It's a teeny, tiny little Gecko looking lizard thingie that was found in the hallway at work today. I almost stepped on him! Or her....I'm not checking to see which it is. Right now, he's running in circles around the little plastic jar I put him in. What do lizards eat? And why was he in my office building? And...what should I name him?

*splash*

Okay, got to have the shallow end today! So, here we are...with new words to make up. Whatcha got?

*sigh*

I don't know how my hubby is dealing with all of this. The hurricane relief efforts and evacuations are about to drive me insane. I don't know how much more I can take. Depression and sadness seem to overcome my days - or at least the few quiet moments I have alone. The stuff that used to be a big deal doesn't even concern me anymore. I can't focus on the crap that surrounds me - it's all so freaking trivial.

Last night Larry came home from the fire station and said that the Chief has been out at the fairgrounds every day, and many nights since Saturday. The bad news: the city (our county seat) is only providing one full time police man for the over 200 evacuees. There are 5 known registered sex offenders, 25 children, many women, and quite a few men. The good news: All is well, most are treating the grounds as they would their homes, many are cleaning up continuously, several are helping repair things that have needed repair, and many are hopeful about getting a job quickly and moving on. Edited to add: It appears our county, who was so willing to take in these evacuees has now realized the efforts are more than they can, or are willing to, handle. And since the area volunteer fire departments did such a wonderful job over the weekend of organizing and making things happen, the county is just going to let the fire departments continue to handle it all. This decision was made the day the City ran an article talking about all the things the county would be doing and how appreciative the City and the County were of the local fire deparments and thanking them for a great job. And the City and County were in contact with the Red Cross and Salvation Army to come in to aid. And, also realized after the article, the Red Cross and Salvation Army are quite busy and cannot relieve the City and County of their duties for about 30 days. Joy. Stupid fucking councilmen for a city I don't live in. So...looks like Larry and I and many others will continue to volunteer our time. At the moment, it appears that meals are taken care of for the next couple of weeks.

So...I've turned off the steady CNN feed and tried to distance myself from the reports a bit. Today at lunch, we are hosting a few of the local families from the hotels for a barbeque. Keep me in your thoughts - I'm going to need some strength to get through this one.

International Help

Nice to know that the Prez finally decided he was man enough to accept assistance from other countries after his most ignorant statement ever that we could take care of our own.

The list of countries offering assistance astounded me....and the types of assistance was almost heartwarming. Hell, I thought most of these countries hated us.

Canada offered troops, copters and cash
Mexico offered help
Afghanistan pledged $100K
Venezuela pledged a crap load of gasoline
Qatar offered a lot of money
Cuba (!?!?!?) offered support...

And I know there are several others....

And then of course, there's the idiotic statement from He Who Irritates Me saying he will oversee a panel to figure out what went wrong. WHAT WENT WRONG?!!??! It was a fucking hurricane. Everything went wrong. But...I'm trying to stay on the good side of it all today, so we'll save that for later.

The good in people can shine through...

Most of Sunday was spent down at the volunteer fire station where DH spends much of his "free" time. The kids and I headed there to help collect donations, organize them and pack them into trucks to take to a couple of designated refugee temporary homes. Four ambulances were filled. Over $200 in cash was donated. More people promised to be back on Labor Day with more stuff.

At 3pm Sunday afternoon, the county fairgrounds called to say please hold all donations. They had more than enough to begin assisting the 200+ people there. They wanted to divert some of it to places that had not received their slated evacuees yet or any donations. Reunion Arena in Dallas has halted donations temporarily. As have a few other places in the area that I've heard about so far. Most are saying to give them this week to find out what else is needed and go from there. So for now, our department voted to go with my suggestion and send what we're holding to a local women's shelter. And as more comes in, we're holding it and waiting.

I cannot believe the sheer volume of shoes, toys, clothes, coats, linens, towels, diapers, toothpaste, shampoo, etc that I sorted on Sunday. Our county is not by any stretch a rich area. In fact, I'd venture to guess that 50% of the county lives below the national poverty line. And to see these people bring in brand new toiletries, barely used clothes and toys to aid in the evacuees' help. It was a wonderful thing.

And the best part of the day? Seeing an 8 year old little girl for a second time. She and her mom and brought in several huge bags of clothes and toys. They came back about an hour or two later (time seemed to stand still Sunday) because one toy had fallen out of the bag in the backseat of their car.

There are still good people out there. And they surround us all.

Live from New Orleans...with a bit of time delay

Text message #1 at 4:17 CST: It's damn messed up
My reply: What's up?
Text message #2 at 4:17 CST: Pray
My reply: You? Or all of New Orleans?
Text message #3 at 4:24 CST: Fucked up
My reply: I can only imagine
Text message #4 at 4:26 CST: Horrible. So sad.

And then the phone call from 20 miles east of Lafayette, LA:
He's on the way to Houston. Four patients in their truck, the other three trucks are loaded much the same way. They were supposed to only load nine patients from step down hospitals. Five criticals and four non. By the end of it all, they had 15 evacuated. A Marine stopped them two minutes from the time they were to leave and asked them to please follow him to a hospital that had been evacuated two days ago. He'd found a man alive in there that had been left for dead. The Marine had made rounds through the hospital yesterday and thought the man was dead. Today, he realized he was alive. DH and four other medics and two Marines got him out, made a walk through of the entire hospital and found 15 others...who they believe had been left for dead as well. And they had passed on. As they finished loading all of their patients, a NO cop came up to them and told them to get the hell out. The looters near the convention center had noticed the trucks and were on their way to the hospital, which was only a few blocks away. Needless to say, they loaded and took off. DH did say that they couldn't and wouldn't leave anyone they found alive, even if they are overloaded with patients. They also have four nurses with them from the hospital, who have been working since Sunday night. DH has four in the back of his truck, and one riding up front with him.

They had been escorted in, and out, by a helicopter with two shooters hanging out over their truck and two Marines per truck. They left town with two Department of Defense people who are riding all the way to Houston with them. They DoD guys have to get to Galveston to re-load with supplies and head back. DH and the others from the company will be heading back here after they take their patients to Houston hospitals.

DH said mentally and physically, he cannot go back for a day or two. It's just too horrid. He took some pictures with his camera phone....I can only imagine what he must have seen and heard and felt.

...........................................................

I thought 9/11 changed the US forever. Hurricane Katrina will do more to the US than the terrorists ever thought about doing. There are 8 families that arrived in our town today to stay at a local motel. One of the men has already secured a job at Wal-Mart. All 8 families are saying they will not go back to New Orleans. They've lived their entire lives there, and cannot bear to return. The memories, the pain, the heart ache, and the destruction are too much for them to handle. I know they are only a few of thousands upon thousands of evacuees. But how many of them feel this way? How many have seen their life long homes for the last time? How many cannot bear to return? And will their lives (and ours) ever be the same again? Somehow, I think this is even more tragic. More devastating.